10 Funny Jokes about England UK

England is a country with so many attractions for the visitors and residents that you just can’t pass up the fun and chances of getting entertained. England is rich in its culture art and cuisine. Along with the advancement in science and technology, England has maintained its history and traditions. Beautiful weather, natural landscapes, and a lot many tourists’ attractions are there to get you entertained. Historical places, museums, theme parks and shopping centre will make you go crazy and enjoy your time to the fullest. Seaside resorts of England are the entertaining vacationers where you can eat, drink and play or just soak up some sunshine on the deck chairs. Family fun just gets on when you think of a vacation to enjoy the adventure that England offers. Here are some funny jokes about England to multiple your fun and give you a good laugh.



1) An Englishman went into a hardware store and asked to buy a sink.
'Would you like one with a plug?' asked the assistant.
'Don't tell me they've gone electric,' said the Englishman.


2) The bus driver to a woman: “That’s the ugliest baby that I’ve ever seen. Ugh!” The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: “The driver just insulted me!” The man says: “You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I’ll hold your monkey for you.”


3) Tell me something amazing about your country?
Only in England...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.


4) What do you call an Englishman in the knockout stages of the World Cup?
A referee.


5) Q: What's the difference between England and a tea bag?
A: The tea bag stays in the cup longer.


6) Why isn’t the England football team allowed to own a dog?
Because they can't hold on to a lead!


7) "The British empire, sir," exclaimed an orator, "is one on which the sun never sets."— "And one," replied an auditor, " in which the tax-collector never goes to bed."


8) The England team went out to visit an orphanage in Cape Town on Saturday morning. "It's good to put a smile on the faces of people with no hope, constantly struggling and facing the impossible," said Jamal Umboto, aged 6.


9) What do you call an Englishman with an IQ of 50? 
Colonel, sir.


10) I have news for you my friend….
Hey what’s that…
Britain has invented a new missile. It's called the civil servant - it doesn't work and it can't be fired 

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